April 03, 2007


i've done the worst thing i've ever done. i had to make the worst decision ever yesterday. peter attacked luda again. this is the 3rd time in a month and a half. only the kids were home with the dogs when it happened. both b and i were at work.

it was not good.

peter, literally, scared the shit out of luda while attacking him. there were feces all over the kitchen as well as all over luda. luda has a 3 inch deep puncture in his neck which is swollen to high heaven and an inch deep puncture in his face near his lip. at first we thought the one in his lip went all the way through but it doesn't.

i took pete in yesterday. it was the worst thing i've ever done. killing my dog. i know i made the right decision but i still feel guilty as hell and so very sad. i miss him so much. in all other respects he was such a great dog. i just couldn't trust him anymore. he wasn't just attacking luda for clear reason anymore. it was unclear as to why. it all seems to have been food related but with no clear understanding as to why. there were too many variables. too unpredictable.

especially with the kids home alone for the 2 hours after school.

now the worst part is that brian is blaming jonah because when i asked jonah to feed the dogs he didn't stand in the kitchen while they ate. it's not jonah's fault that peter attacked luda. ultimately if brian wants to blame anyone he should blame me since i'm the one who told jonah to feed the dogs in the first place.

after i left the vet for peter and went home. i checked luda out and saw that he was worse than brian originally thought. i went back to the vet with both luda and ethel. luda for obvious reason and ethel because she is due for shots and i figured i was there anyway so i might as well get it out of the way. so they wanted to keep him overnight and put drains in his wounds which would have cost upwards of $300 which after the day i already had... i just couldn't spend. so they flushed his wounds, gave him a shot of antibiotics, a dose of under the skin fluids, and sent him home with oral antibiotics and pain killers. he's still in a lot of pain and i have to watch his wounds so that they don't turn into abscesses. also if they start to fill up i'll have to have them drained so i have to watch for that too. the poor guy.

this sucks. the whole situation sucks.

Peter Edward
July 8th 1994 - April 2nd 2007
He was dearly loved and will be greatly missed.

giggle-more at 8:50 AM


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